My First Ambulance Ride

A lot has happened since I last wrote on Saturday night. Namely, I spent Sunday night at Florida Hospital Altamonte after being taken there by ambulance that afternoon. Why? I had a miscarriage. I found out about the miscarriage on Friday, the 13th at 10.5 weeks pregnant. A sad day to be sure. The pregnancy seemed normal. I felt nauseous, tired, etc. I had no cramping, bleeding, or anything else that would suggest things weren't proceeding normally. I went in for a routine checkup and when they did an ultrasound, there was a sac, but no baby in it. This is a phenomenon known as a blighted ovum and is one of most common forms of miscarriages. Obviously we are quite saddened by these events as we were looking forward to a little brother or sister for Calleigh. But, we know that all things work together for good for those that love the Lord and have faith that there will be another baby some time in the future.

Sooo, back to the hospital story. When you have a miscarriage, there are several options of how to deal with the part that is still inside of you. I don't want to get too graphic here. The options are (1) Letting nature take its course (2) Drugs (3) Surgical procedure. I opted for (1). And that is indeed what happened on Sunday. I started bleeding very heavily in the morning. Around 3 pm, with Duncan upstairs and Calleigh taking a nap, I got off the couch to use the bathroom. After going, I felt lightheaded and sat down on the bathroom floor. The next thing I knew, I was lying on my back and Duncan was standing over me shouting my name. I had passed out. This happened two more times in about a five minute period. Duncan thought I was dying so he called 911 and 5 minutes later, the ambulance was at my house and 3 EMT's were pushing a stretcher into my living room - - much to my chagrin. I knew how much it cost to take an ambulance ride and I wasn't excited about paying it. Obviously I still had some of my sensibilities about me, right?? Duncan waited at home with a sleeping Calleigh until Shannon got home and then he met me at the hospital.

I spent the next 8.5 hours in the ER and had various things done including an EKG (they did an EKG in the ambulance which came out abnormally but the one at the hospital was fine), pelvic exam, and ultrasound. Either Duncan or Shannon was at my side the whole time so that we a comforting thing. I wasn't really in any pain other than some light cramping thankfully but I was forbidden to walk so that meant I couldn't use the bathroom. Not a fun thing in this particular situation.

At about 12:30 am, the doctor told me that I was going to be admitted because they couldn't let me go while I was still bleeding. My blood levels continued to drop and they were concerned that I may need a transfusion. I was greatly perturbed with having to stay the night but what are you going to do? So I was transferred up to a room and I must say, even though I didn't want to be there, the care was outstanding. My nurses were so wonderful, friendly, and caring. Around 1:30 am, I told Duncan to go home so he could be with Calleigh (Shannon was obviously there while Duncan was with me). They gave me some other drugs through an IV that were supposed to help things along and I ended up getting about 2 hours of sleep. At 9 am, the gynecologist came in to see me. She was a very nice lady and I liked her even more when she told me that everything had come out and I was good to go home. I was so relived. I was afraid that I would end up having to have the surgical procedure despite all of what I went through so I was quite happy with the outcome. I was discharged at 12:30 pm and have been home relaxing since then. Because of my blood loss, I'm quite weak and tired but I'm home so that's the important thing.

You know what the worst thing was? It wasn't the embarrassment of going to the hospital in unmatched pajamas, messy hair, and no deodorant, or getting poked with multiple needles(including two times when people couldn't find a vein and poked and poked), or having to use a bedpan with very weird things coming out of you, or lying in an uncomfortable bed in a cold ER room for hours, or barely getting any sleep, or not getting anything to eat or drink for 22 hours, or having a catheter put in, or having bad cramps in the middle of the night and having to take morphine. Nope. It wasn't any of that. The worst thing by far was being separated from Calleigh. I knew she was in the best of hands at home but oh, how I missed her terribly. When the doctor told me I would be there overnight, I cried and cried. I wouldn't be there in the morning to see her standing up smiling in her crib waiting for me to pick her up. I have not been away from her overnight before and I did not like it at all. I was concerned about nursing her. Fortunately, she does like the vanilla Silk soy milk so they gave her bottles of that in my absence. Duncan brought in my pump so I was able to keep up with that. But all I could think about as I lay there by myself in the hospital bed was when would I get to see my baby again?

The answer to that question was about 10 am on Monday morning. I walked back into my room coming from my exam with the doctor and there she was! Duncan had brought her in to see me, not knowing when I would be going home. What a sight! She was walking around next to my bed with kind of a bewildered look on her face. When she saw me, she just stared. Of course, I still had an IV in my arm at the time and I was pushing the IV pole next to me. I think she was very confused as to what was going on. But then when I sat down on the bed and someone put her on my lap, all was back to normal. She started chattering and climbing all over me and it felt so good! I wasn't able to nurse at all yesterday because of the medications I'm taking but today we were back to that and it was like she never took a vacation from it for which I'm very thankful.

So there you have it. That's what I've been up to for the last few days. Although it was a traumatic experience, there are so many things to be thankful for. Thank goodness it happened on a Sunday with Duncan at home and that Calleigh was sleeping. I would have hated for her to see me leaving in an ambulance. Thank goodness the bleeding stopped and I didn't need to have anything else done. Thank the Lord that Shannon is living with us right now and so I have my own personal nurse here looking after me. Thank you to my mother-in-law Elaine that just jumped right in with taking care of Calleigh on Sunday night and brought me home from the hospital yesterday. Most of all, I thank the Lord for my husband. If nothing else, this event strengthened my love for him ten fold. He was so incredibly kind and good to me and his love for me really kept me going. Without a second thought, he cleaned me up while I was on the bed in the ER, changing my bedpans. Believe me when I tell you that was not a pretty picture. It is often through experiences like these that you either see the best or worst in someone and I saw Duncan at his very best. He is an amazing husband.

In unrelated news, Calleigh has really picked up on this walking thing. She's tooting around by foot quite frequently now. I would say about 2/3 of her travels are now done on foot rather than knee. I'm looking forward to not having to clean dirt stains off the knees of her clothes.

These pictures of her are from Sunday morning. Duncan went out that morning with Ron to play a round of golf. Calleigh was quite intrigued with the golf clubs. She did a full inspection. The reason she is only in her diaper is because of a new little trick she has learned with her nuby (sippy cup). She figured out that if you turn it over and press the mouthpiece part on the ground, water will come out. So now she loves to do this and make little puddles everywhere (well, at least until I notice what she's doing and take it away). She made one of these little puddles and then crawled right through it and got herself all wet so off came the clothes, and hence the pictures of her in only a diaper.

Just a final note - - I know that it can very awkward knowing what to say when someone has suffered a miscarriage. I went to tell you that yes, it was tough but I have dealt with it and I'm moving on. Please don't feel afraid to talk to me or anything like that. I won't start crying or go bonkers if you happen to mention what happened. I'm still the same person only stronger.